No Picket Fence?

Photo courtesy of Brad Switzer, Unsplash

In the mid-20th century, the dream of a home with a picket fence took off. The always-perfectly dressed mothers in 1950s sitcoms wore pearls as they fastidiously cleaned their equally perfect homes. Perfect homes, perfect families, perfect lives—impossibly perfect narratives that ended up unintentionally fanning the unrest and dissatisfaction with the status quo that fed the societal upheaval of the 60s. All because they didn't have a picket fence.

We see the same phenomenon today. Social media portrays perfectly coiffed people in POVs that seem to mock the imperfections in your less than standard life. Sadly, the longing for AI perfection (which is not to be had) tends to lead the unwary to anxiety, depression, a feeling that one's own life is wanting. All because we are focusing on something that is not truly there. Longing for what we see in someone else's life, that evanescent picket fence, is nothing more than a recipe for dissatisfaction and, in many cases, devastation.

Embracing a recognized lack in ourselves or in our lives and praying/looking for how to rise above it is one thing, depression and pouty attitudes another. The Bible gives clear examples of people who were lacking good stuff but, instead of sulking, they took the bull by the horns. Determined to lead their best life within their reality—even if it didn't include the coveted picket fence—they came out with really, really good things in their lives, as well as new and improved picket fences.

First, there is Mephibosheth, he of the lame feet. Born a prince, dropped and crippled by his nurse, he lived a life of abject poverty until King David took him under his wing. His first words to David give us insight into his attitude. "Behold, thy servant!" he answered David upon being called into his presence. Not, "I hate you, you ruined my status as a prince of Israel, you stole my life!" Instead, Mephibosheth humbly acknowledged the kingship of David. He did not begrudge him what God had ordained. The result? He was restored to land and prosperity, eating at the king's table every day of his life. It wasn't his original picket fence, but by embracing God's will in the change of kingship, he was given something right up there with it. Within the confines of a new reigning king, he had a new kind of picket fence, something that was as close to the original as it could get ( 2 Samuel 9:6-13).

We see the Shunamite woman who blessed the prophet Elisha with a room of his own. She had no children, which in that day and age were a sign of wealth and God's favor, but instead of living a life of sulkiness and self pity, she put her hand to plow, seeking how to enrich the life of those around her. The prophet was so blessed by her generosity that he prophesied a son for her, which in due season she had. By focusing on others instead of her own pain, God gave the Shunamite the desires of her heart, her very own and totally unexpected picket fence (2 Kings 4:8-37).

Then there is Joseph. Sold into slavery, taken to a land far away from his family, he had every "reason" to embrace bitterness and ugly attitudes. Instead? He embraced God. He lived for Him. He did his best for Him, even with the loss of his picket fence—the life he expected to live as the beloved son of his father. And by embracing his new reality, a life far different from any of the dreams of his childhood, he found a new picket fence: power, wealth, family—and eventually the restoration of his original family (Genesis 37-50).

Oh, Eve, Eve, Eve! If only you had realized that the picket fence with which the slithery serpent was enticing you was nothing more than ephemera, a fleeting thing that would provide only a transitory sense of joy, a momentary delight that would quickly morph into a sense of loss, a longing for the lost presence of the Almighty, augmented by the weight of a sinful nature, and physical mortality. If only ...

Oh, Lord, help me to embrace the picket fence You gift me. It is in Genesis 17:1 that You reveal Yourself as El Shaddai , a name translated as "the God Who is more than enough." That is Who You are. The picket fence we long for. Let me not yearn for "something else" that in reality is not real, but only ephemeral. Help me choose You. Always.

"As for me, I will behold thy face in righteousness: I shall be satisfied when I awake, with thy likeness" (Psalm 17:15).

"Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for him; fret not thyself because of him who prospereth in his way, because of the man who bringeth wicked devices to pass" (Psalms 37:7).