Let It Go!

It is said that in the Philippines, among other places, there is a unique method for capturing monkeys. A hunter anchors a narrow mouthed jar to the ground, places something any upstanding monkey would crave--a piece of fruit, peanuts, a shiny object--and waits for nature to take its course. Monkey walks by, monkey looks in jar, monkey reaches for the goody in the jar--monkey is trapped.

How can that be? If the monkey got his hand in the jar, it stands to reason he can get his little hand out of the jar, right? To our way of thinking, yes. To a monkey's, not so much.

Turns out the monkey can't get his little fat hand out of the jar because he is so entranced with the "treasure" he has found that he refuses to let it go. If he were to release the object of his desires, his hand would slide out of the opening, easy-peasy, but with his hand wrapped around something so that his hand is a fist? Can't get it out. He is trapped.

My first husband, Steve, loved this story and preached about it more than once. He should know. His monkey-fist-grabbing almost cost him all his dreams.

Back in the day, after he finished Bible school, he began working full time at night at a secular job so he could work full time at his church as the associate pastor. At that time the church's income precluded paying the salary of an associate. But Steve loved his pastor, loved his church, and willingly did what he had to in order to be a part of the ministry team. His dream was to continue working there full time, but get on salary at some point in the future so he wouldn't have to burn both ends of the candle.

The only problem was that the board knew him too well. Every time the church's income grew to where the church was in a position to hire another staff member, someone would be sure to say, "Well, we need a youth pastor (or worship leader or children's director, whatever the need was at that time) but we can't get someone for that position without offering them a salary. We know Steve will work for free, so lets use that money to pay for that new position." So Steve's salary would be bypassed again so that the new staff member could be added. The end result? Year in and year out Steve kept working his secular job in order to minister.

To add insult to injury, the independent church he worked in did not believe that a single person was a viable minister. If you had been working 20 years in the ministry but weren't married, you were "an aspiring minister." If you were 3 months out of Bible school and had just started ministering but (ding! ding! ding!) you were married, why, shoot feller, you were hands down a full-fledged minister! Steve was not married.

It did not matter that he had graduated from Bible school. It did not matter that he worked full time in a secular job in order to work full time at the church. He was not married so all he was thought of was a lowly aspiring minister.

Not that he didn't want to get married ... At one point he set his eye on a gal in the group of young people he hung around with. She played the piano and, he thought, would be a wonderful asset in the Lord's work. Plus, if he could marry her, he'd be on his way to being accepted as a real, honest-to-goodness minister!

His marital dreams came crashing down the day she and a young man from the group came waltzing in showing off the engagement ring he had just placed on her finger. There went that dream.

Could things get any worse? Yes, they could. To top it all off, the Holy Spirit began tugging at Steve about being a missionary. To be blunt, that was one area of ministry he wanted no part of. He had seen brash missionaries who tried to pry money out of the congregation and the church. With his strong sense of financial integrity and perhaps a kind of pride in not wanting to be associated with a group of people who at times seemed to take advantage of God's flock, being a missionary was not for him. No siree, he wanted nothing to do with anything "missionary". He would stay at his home church, eventually get on as paid staff, get married, and some day be recognized as a 100% bona fide minister. His monkey paw was in that jar and he would not let go of his dreams! Ah ... but God ...

God kept nudging. Steve kept praying ... and one day, thanks to some godly advice from a spiritual mentor, he got up the gumption to let go of his dreams and take the plunge into God's. He went down to south Texas to King's Way Missionary Institute and studied Spanish. It was only then, when he took those first steps to go God's way, that he found a wife and began to be appreciated as a minister. In giving up his dreams, he found the fulfillment of his heart's desires.

Now he was recognized as a real minister. Now he had a wife, a helpmeet in the ministry (she couldn't play the piano but she could teach children). Now he was doing what God had called him to do. When he let go of the shiny objects in the jar, God was freed to give him his heart's desires.

May God help us all not to be monkeys caught by a jar filled with our own mediocre wants. May we let go of our dreams--and step into God's!

Scary? Maybe. Better? No doubt about it--His way will always trump whatever dreams we might harbor!

Let's let the old dreams go--and reach for the gold!

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:9-10